We all fall in love sometimes
by KatheMS
Summary: She used to 'wear' those pleading eyes for freedom, for her dignity, for her life… Now, she was begging this wonderful man to wait until she was ready to be loved again. AU Story.
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Hi everyone! I hope you enjoy this weird story. I'ts veeeery much AU.

Another note :P: The song at the beginning of the story is "We all fall in love sometimes" (hence the name of the fanfic)... I heard Coldplay version of this song in the album Revamp: The songs of Elton John & Bernie Taupin, fell in love with it even more and thought immediately about Mulder and Scully.

 _ **We all fall in love sometimes**_

 **Chapter one: A strange feeling**

 _The full moon's bright_

 _Starlight filled the evening_

 _We wrote it and I played it_

 _Something happenin'_

 _It's so strange this feelin'_

 _Naive notions that were childish_

 _Simple tunes that tired to hide it, when it comes_

 _We all fall in love sometimes…_

* * *

Her phone ringed at 10:00 at night on a Saturday… She knew who it was.

She wanted to hear his voice, but no exactly at this moment when every part of her body was in pain because she was a woman. But, oh well! She couldn't just leave him waiting there on the other side of the line… Besides, maybe his voice would help soothe her pain… especially the one all around and inside her boobs.

"Hello," she said in a not so happy tone. A hand on her very swollen right boob, wishing the suffering will go away with just one touch on it.

He regreted calling her the moment he heard her voice. He even thought about hanging up without saying a word, but this wasn't junior high so… Here's goes nothing…

"Hi, Scully. Sorry about calling this late…" he said.

"Well, it's actually early for one of your calls, Mulder. But…"

"That's not why I'm calling!" Yeah… he'd yelled, but just because he didn't wanted her to misunderstand his intentions with his call. "Sorry. I didn't want to speak so loud…"

What was the other part of his plan calling Scully at this hour again? He forgot, because he didn't actually had a plan… He just wanted to call and ask her out to drink a few beers… Just two friends hanging out on a Saturday night.

But she actually didn't sound like herself.

"Are you ok, Scully?"

She moaned after his question and he didn't know if being aroused by it was a very bad thing or not.

"Not really. If you must know… My boobs are killing me… My whole body is… Oh my God, but my breasts! They're just so big! It's been months since I've been this swollen on this time of the month…. Ugh! My back is killing me! And you know I'm not that big, I don't have bigs boobs, right?..."

"What?! How would I know? Boobs?..." Yeah, he needed to hang up the phone… If they mention her breasts once again, he would have to go and do something for himself. "Mmmm… Maybe I should hang up, Scully, so you can have your rest…"

"Yeah, right! You're just running away because suddenly I'm more than the girl that brings you coffee every morning, right? It's not my fault that I'm broke, have to work two shifts at that crappy diner and because of that I don't have time to have a girlfriend to talk about the amount of pain I'm feeling right now, ok?! It is _your_ fault because you decided to befriend me and now you're on 'girlfriend duty'!"

"But… all I wanted to do was ask you to go out and… have a few beers… Do you want to?" he asked with fear.

"Yes, I want to, Mulder, of course! But I can't because wearing a bra right now is like going to hell for me because of my SWOLLEN BOOBS, OK?!"

'Period Scully' was even scarier than 'Tired Scully,' Mulder realized in that moment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't…"

"Of course you don't know! How could you?! You only have a penis and that doesn't hurt every month!" she shouted at him.

"Well, actually, if you…."

"But since I do want the beers… because maybe if I'll get drunk, that will numb my pain… You are going to come to me," she said with determination.

"What?…" his voice was filled with fear.

"You're gonna have the audacity to say no to me?!" she shouted at him… again.

"No, no. You're the boo-boss, Scully…" Oops! "I'll be there in a bit."

They both hung up.

* * *

What just happened? Who answered the damn phone? Had she just invited (more like demanded) Mulder to come over to her messy apartment?

She was only wearing a big shirt, because other parts of her were also swollen and she couldn't even bear to wear sweat pants or shorts… or anything besides her panties… She didn't wanted to get changed…

Like Mulder, she was also scared of 'Period Scully.' She had a mind of her own…

… Maybe she could wear a sweater over her shirt, so Mulder won't noticed her pointed nipples… But it was a hot night... Or was she just the hot one?... Hot because he was coming over (and they still had to resolved some issues) or hot because of her hormonal situation?

* * *

Something must have happened between that last thought and the moment Mulder woke her up, because she hadn't done any of the things she thought about before, so Mulder wouldn't find her in a decadent state.

There she was laying on her couch, her shirt covering her only from the navel up, so her bare legs and white panties were right in front of Mulder. Oh! And her left hand was still on her right boob. Messy red hair, a bottle of some medicine opened in the table in front of her and glass of water next to it. Very classy.

"Oh God… What happened?" she asked, trying to cover herself somehow and restore her dignity.

"You tell me. Was this just a plan so I could find you dead from too many pain killers and booze?" he said, trying to be funny. But this wasn't the time of the month to be funny, Mulder. You should know better, he thought.

An eyebrow up in the sky and side eyes were all the answer he could get, while she closed the bottle, regretting that time –months ago- when she gave him a copy of the key to her apartament, because she had to hide from Jack (again), so Mulder had to go to her place to take some clothes and personal stuff for her.

"Ha ha. So funny… Where's my beer?" she asked and he sat down next to her. He had a six pack in his left hand.

"Are you sure you want more alcohol, doctor Scully?" he insisted on the bad joke.

She didn't show it, but the joke hurt her a little. That word was the reminder of the life that had been taken away from her. But, soon enough, she brushed away the thought and the feeling, concentrating on her 'swollen' present.

"I didn't know water had alcohol, Mulder… I wasnt trying to kill myself, ok?! I'm just trying to kill the pain in my…"

"Yes! I know! Your boobs!... I think this is the most two people have used that word in a conversation…"

The eyebrow went even higher, but she didn't said anything. She just stood from the couch and walk to her kitchen. One hand holding the bottle of pills, the other holding her… yes, her boobs.

"What happens if you don't… hold them?" he dared to asked.

She turned around and looked at him with killer eyes.

"I would scream in severe pain", she said with no emotion in her voice and finished her walk to the kitchen.

She walked back to the couch with a bowl of chips with sour cream on her free hand and his jaw dropped.

"What is this? You? Chips? Scully?" he said turning to look at her eating a handful of it.

"Hi, I'm 'Hormonal Scully,' nice to meet you," she said, greeting him with a handshake.

He took a deep breath and tried to leave all jokes aside. She was in actual pain and was so confident around him that she didn't mind the fact that he was in the same room with her in that non-Scully way. So he would be a non-Mulder too, for a night at least.

"Here," he said handing her the beer.

"Thank you… And I'm sorry if you see a lot of my panties or something else tonight… I'm really tired and I don't want to get change."

"Don't worry, Scully. I've seen you naked before, remember?"

She stopped on the sip she was about to give to her beer when she heard his comment. Again, another reminder of that first night when he became more than her customer.

"Hmm… I always thought you weren't actually looking at me, considering the circumstances of that night," she said.

Now he was the one with the eyebrow up in the sky.

"Weren't _you_ also looking?" he asked, leaning a bit to her side.

She smiled and drank more beer.

"Well… Now that you've brought up _that_ night, I guess that's the most 'sex' I've had in years… sex that I've agreed upon, anyway", she said and put the cold bottle of beer on her right boob… It looked like that was the one hurting her the most.

"Yes. Well…"

"Nope, sorry. Not a fan of having sex in this state of pain."

"Yeah, you're right." He would just play along with her. Maybe the conversation they started a few weeks before would get resolved tonight.

"Besides, our first time -if we ever get one- shouldn't be like this," she said.

They both finished their beers in silence. Scully had her eyes closed while she drank it and from time to time she massaged her swollen breast. Mulder was trying not to look too much at her… It was dangerous for him. Yes, she was in pain but, for him, it was simply erotic.

"And…" He needed some conversation. "… Does this happen every month?"

She took a deep breath before answering and opened her eyes to look at him.

"Yes, but… It's been a while since the last time it hurt this much… Maybe I'm just getting older… Anyway… Can we talk about something else? Like… I'm glad you're here and all but, why were you really calling me for?"

He knew he would't fool her that long.

"I wanted you to come with me to check out this bar where Monica wants to perform, but she's still new in the business and I would probably need something more to convince the owner or, better yet, distract him…" he answered and took a sip of a second beer, fearing her response.

She did the same thing with a wicked smile on her lips.

"Hmmm… So, you were in need of my pretty face and my former prostituted body?... I'm sure if the guy would have take a look of these swollen boobs, he would have said yes to anything, but, sorry Mulder, I don't do that kind of business anymore, remember?"

He forced a smile and gave her the truest answer he could, one that didn't involve selling her body. He didn't want her for that.

"I know you don't, of course I do. I was just saying stupid things. I did have to go to the bar, but just to sign the papers… I just wanted you by my side on a Saturday night… Every night, actually…"

"Mulder, we've talked about this…" she said, putting the beer on the table in front of her.

"And I'm not going to talk about it now. Don't worry… You're in pain. Drink your beer. Get drunk."

"So you can take me to bed while I'm drunk?". Too much honesty? she thought.

"I would never do that, Scully, especially after everything you've told me about your past. You should know better," he said, all jokes aside.

She regreted her words.

They both drank their beers in silence again. But suddenly she stood up.

"I'm gonna go put a bra on."

"Are you feeling better? Less swollen?" he was actually concerned about her.

"No. But I shouldn't be dressed like this in front of you…"

"Oh, Scully, come on!" he said and grabbed her hand while she was walking away.

He managed to stopped her and turned her around. Then he stood up from the couch.

"This is your home. You should be comfortable in whatever you want to wear. Don't mind me or… him," he said looking down at his pants, revealing his growing erection.

He'd tried not to… But her legs, her nipples, and the thought of her wearing nothing but a white panties under that white shirt was too arousing.

"… I'm gonna go. Enjoy the rest of the beers," he said and started to walked away.

"There's no point on getting drunk alone, Mulder," she started to walked to the door, where he already was. "You don't have to go and I don't mind the fact that you've been erected since I opened my eyes a moment ago… I can't offer you my body right now, but I know how you feel –you know how I feel- … It will happen…"

He approached to her and hugged her. He needed her to know that he wasn't there just for her body. He could feel a bit of her discomfort from having her swollen breasts pressed to his chest, but she stood in his embrace anyway and that, to him, was a start.

"Are they hot?" he asked all of the sudden, pushing her away from him and watching her boobs a little bit too closely.

"Yes! They are! I thought it was just me imagining things," she said and even though her pain, she hugged him again. "Don't go, please. Stay. I'll promise I'll be a better person tomorrow and I can offer you a nice Sunday… with no swollen boobs."

He smiled at the last part.

"Thank you for the offering, but I'm well aware that you have an early shift tomorrow. So stop making promises you can't keep," he said, still wearing that beautiful smile she already loved.

She looked down, a bit embarrassed of her desperate attempt to make him stay. But, who were they actually kidding? Maybe only themselves, and poorly. They were in love.

It all started that night when, without him really knowing it, he had saved her life from her abbusive ex husband. He had done the exact same thing for her three times now. The man, Jack, was stubborn and wouldn't let her go or be.

Dana knew that, she felt her love for Mulder and was desperate to give it to him without any restraint. But the ghost of Jack was still around in her mind, her broken soul and body, and she needed to heal first. She wanted Mulder to have the woman he deserved.

Right now, she still felt like the broken prostitute in which her husband had turn her into two years ago, when he decided she'd be the only one to made money in their 'family', offering her body to men while he watched them.

She broke the hug and looked up at him with pleading eyes.

"Please, don't give up on me yet. I'm here to be yours, I truly am. Give me time," she begged him. "Tonight… I'm…" she started but he needed to interrupted her.

"I'm not here for your body, Dana… Yes, I want you, I won't lie, but you also know how my heart feels about you… And I know that it's not time for us, yet… I know he's still around. Three months ago I made a promise to you, and back then you were just a nice waitress who needed my help in that lonely diner, now you're all I think about and I'm still here to keep that promise, because I lo…"

"Don't", she interrupted him, putting a finger on his lips. "Please, don't. Don't say it yet. This isn't me. This is what he left behind," she said, again with the same pleading eyes.

Life was full of ironies. Before she used to 'wear' those pleading eyes for freedom, for her dignity, for her life… Now, she was begging this wonderful man to wait until she was ready to be loved again.

* * *

Please, tell me what you thought about this. Thank you


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note:** I can't believe I forgot to thank my friend harperrose87 for her amazing help, reviewing this crazy story. I love you! One more thing. In this chapter, we also have the song "She used to be mine" from Sara Bareilles. I looooove that woman sooo much. She's a true inspiration.

 **Another note :P :** Please, let me know (after reading this one, of course) if you think I should continue with this. I know is very weird.

 _ **We all fall in love sometimes**_

 **Chapter two: She used to be mine**

 _…_ _Did we, didn't we, should we, couldn't we_

 _I'm not sure cause sometimes we're so blind_

 _Strugglin' through the day_

 _When even your best friends say_

 _Don't you find_

 _We all fall in love sometimes..._

* * *

 _Weird night tonight… I wasn't expecting any of this to happen…_

 _At first I thought I read right through him, only wanting to get me out of my house to get me drunk and get in my pants. Since my sore boobs didn't allow him that he came here, six pack in hand._

 _But he didn't want me just for sex –yes, his erection gave him away at one point, but I will be kind to him about it, because I was practically naked in front of him-. He wants me, my heart, my broken soul, my abused body, my mind, my dreams. He says he wants to be with me, Dana Scully, not with the sex toy I once were._

 _Should I believe him? Is he for real?_

 _If not, he has a really first class act because he's right outside, sleeping on my couch and he didn't try anything on me. I was the one who started the kiss, just to make him stay (I didn't wanted to be alone tonight), but he stopped it before I gave away more of me. We finished our beers and in the kindest possible way he asked if he could stay –considering he had been drinking and couldn't drive like that- I said yes and lead him to my bedroom._

 _The panic on his face when he saw me getting rid of my shirt in front of him was actually endearing. He turned around so fast, it was as if he had never seen a naked woman before… but he just didn't wanted to violate my intimicy and the whore that still lives in me (old habits die hard, I guess) got the wrong message and I embarrassed myself… again…_

 _He's right outside but I want him here with me, maybe not to have sex, but just to feel a body that's protecting me instead of hurting me…_

 _'_ _Don't be a fool, he just wants your body. After you give that to him, he will disappear, or worst, he would do what Jack did' … That's my brain talking… Will I ever trust anyone again? Should I trust him? Should I believe him?_

 _…_ _I want to believe…_

* * *

Morning came for Mulder with a big pain on his neck… He was used to sleep on his couch, but not on Scully's, apparently.

6:30 a.m. and for the first time he was waking up in her apartment. He couldn't hide a grin. He was happy, she was gonna be the first thing he'd see that Sunday morning.

She probably was about to get up and rush to work, but it will be time enough to see her beautiful self and kiss her (on the cheek) goodbye until 2:00 in the afternoon, when her shift would be over and he would pick her up and spend the rest of the day with her.

Suddenly his cellphone rang and Leyla's name was on the screen.

"Why are you calling me at this hour Leyla? What does Monica want?" he asked without trying to hide is anger at her call.

Just as he was about to listen to whatever Monica's new assitant had to say, Scully came into the living room, already dressed in her waitress uniform, her hair pulled back in a high pony tail and her gold cross around her neck.

But there was a new piece of jewelry on her that morning: on her right wrist there was a bracelet unknown to him, but what was not was the pendant on it. It had been a gift from him last month, for her birthday: a golden butterfly. He came across the item a few weeks before and thought about her when he saw it.

Mulder wanted Scully to be as free as a butterfly. Free from her cruel past and he wanted her to have something to represent that feeling he knew she also had. But she said she wasn't ready to wear it yet, especially not on that night when Jack had been on the hunt for her (which was the reason why she was with Mulder on the night of her birthday. He was hiding her). But she assured to him that she would soon wear it and that he would be a part of the reason behind her strength to do it.

"Mulder!" Leyla shouted on the other end of the phone and he was brought back to reality, not before giving Scully a smile she gladly reply.

"I'm sorry Leyla, I wasn't paying attention," he said with his eyes still on Scully.

"Yeah, I'm aware of that… Where are you?! We're outside your door and you're not answering. Monica is waiting in the car and is desperate to talk to you." Leyla also sounded desperate. "You didn't sign the papers last night with Mr. Mills and now he's saying he won't hired her for the two months you guys had talk about," the girl added.

"Ok. Tell Monica I'll go speak with him and I'll go to her house after that. I'm not in my apartment right now. She won't lose this, don't worry," he assured the assistant and hung up the cellphone.

He stood up from the couch and walked to Scully, who was about to make some coffee.

"Don't you get tired of making coffee?" he asked, once he was in the kitchen, teasing her.

She turned around and gave him the side eye.

"I'm making it for you, so you should at least say thank you. I suppose you won't have time to go to the diner with me and I simply can't leave a customer unsatisfied," she finished with a smile.

She was about to turn the machine on when his hand stopped her.

"Don't worry about it. My coffee injection can wait. I'll go to the diner after I'm done with Mr. Mills…"

"But you just said you're going to your boss' house after signing the papers. You don't have to lie to me, Mulder. I'm not asking for anything. Besides, it's my fault that you dind't do your job last night," she looked down and started to walk away from him.

"I'm not lying…" he declared. "How are you feeling this morning?... How's your… your chest?" he said looking at her breasts covered under her uniform and sweater.

"Much better, actually. Thanks for asking… and for staying…"

She got close to him. It would be so easy to kiss him in that moment, but instead she just gave him a hug. He hugged her back and hold her tight, both his hands on the small of her back, caressing the spot.

"Do you need to go to the bathroom or something before we get out?" she asked, still in their embrace.

"Yes, please. It'll be just a moment", he answered. Kissed the top of her head and broke the hug, giving her the sweetest smile before walking away.

She could get used to that loving smile. She could get used to the happiness he was willing to give her. Should she do it?

"Hey, I didn't know you go by 'Katie'…", he said entering the living room with a necklace with that name on it.

"Yes, most of the people in my family called me by my middle name because I have an aunt called Dana too, so they do it to not get confused or something… My mom gave me that necklace, but Jack took it away after we got married. He gave it back to me that time he was in the diner, when the police took him away because of the restraining order you helped me get… He didn't like me wearing the necklace. He said I should honored my first name, Dana, and never hide it or covered it with silly nicknames… I guess he just wanted my name to put it out there for everyone to get, to sell it, like he sold every part of me…" she had to stopped talking because of the tears that were falling down her face.

Mulder held her hand and gave the necklace to her.

"Maybe he went there to give it to you so you can restore your life with the name you want, so you can stop being what he created out of you…"

She looked up to him, trying to wipe away her tears.

"No… that was just another trick from him to get me back… Thank God we had the restraining order, right?" she said, trying to smile and forget the bad memory. "Can we go now? I can't be late for work."

* * *

 _It's not simple to say_

 _Most days I don't recognize me_

 _That these shoes and this apron_

 _That place and its patrons_

 _Have taken more than I gave them_

 _It's not easy to know_

 _I'm not anything like I used to be_

 _Although it's true_

 _I was never attention's sweet center_

 _I still remember that girl…_

"Thank you for driving me… and for staying last night..." She said avoiding his eyes because, actually, she was ashamed of how much she had come to need him by her side to feel strong.

"It was my absolute pleasure. I promise I won't be long with Monica and I'll be back to spend the morning watching you work," he answered with a wide smile.

"That would be nice. Remember we have the brunch menu today. It will be waiting for you."

She gave him a wide smile too and a kiss on the cheek, before getting out of the car in the corner of Fran's diner, the place where she had found refuge after she managed to escape her ex husband and had to build a new life, this time really for herself.

She wasn't gonna lie. The job was tedious but tiring, at times she could feel her neurons dying with the lack of actual use… She was built to give so much more to the world than being a waitress, but Jack had destroy her. So –in the meantime- she had created a new persona: a quiet girl, humble, one that didn't expect much out of life as long as she would get her paycheck at the end of the month and decent tips everyday… She just had a complicated past, with an abusive ex husband, like so many other women… Dana Scully, the waitress, was just one of the bunch, nothing special about her, only a dedicated worker who accepted two shifts everyday (except on Sundays) because she was in need of money.

But Dana Katherine Scully, the former medical student, was around in there somewhere, building herself up inside the empty vessel her body was now, after what he –the person who was supposed to be the love of her life- had done to her in only two years of marriage.

After what happened with Jack she was embarrassed and left everything behind in Washington D.C. She didn't have much, actually, but her family was there and she had to leave them. At that point, she thought she was responsable for what her husband had made her do, so she didn't feel capable of looking her mother again in the eyes, or any of her siblings. She only thought of herself as a victim, rather than responsible, when she met Mulder.

Jack had forced her to leave med school, so she didn't had to get back to that either. She wouldn't do it anyway, since embarrassment was the one feeling she could hold at the moment. After all, videos of her doing all kind of sexual atrocities were in the Internet, anyone could see her and recognize her.

"Katie?".

Someone said when she was about to open the door to the diner. Only that it wasn't just anyone, she would have recognize that voice in any corner of the world.

Fear invaded every inch of her body. She tried to see over her shoulder to check if Mulder was still there insided his car, able to save her again. But he wasn't. Maybe she didn't needed to be saved that time…

"Turn around, Katie. It's me, Bill," the man talked again, giving her the proof she needed to be completely sure of her assumptions. Blood was thicker than water, they say, and apparently –this time- blood had brought brother and sister together after so long.

She took a deep breath and turned around, taking a new step in her path to bring herself back to live.

"Hi," she said, trying to put a smile on her face.

Bill Scully couldn't be happier. It had been almost two years since the last time he saw his baby sister. All because of that devil she had married to. He was supposed to be family, to be a trustworthy man, but instead he took Dana away and practically locked her up in their apartment. She wasn't allowed to visit her family or even talk to them on the phone. After that semester was over, she could't go back to medical school and, as far as Bill knew, she had some kind of job, Jack had involved her into, inside their home. Last year he found out what that "job" was, but he couldn't find her anymore, it was as if he had buried her underground.

Bill couldn't wait any longer and ran to hug her. Five months ago he even thought that she had died, but on that night when Jack had called him asking for Dana hope returned to Bill's heart and to the entire family. If he was looking for her so desperately it could only mean that she had escaped and was finally free. However, the Police Department efforts to find her were as good as nothing.

But now here she was, in the same corner as him in a random street in Pasadena, California.

"I thought I would never see you again, Katie," Bill said, approaching to her to finally gave her that anticipated hug. "This is unbelievable… How are you, sis?"

 _…She's imperfect but she tries_

 _She's good but she lies_

 _She is hard on herself_

 _She is broken and won't ask for help_

 _She is messy but she's kind_

 _She is lonely most of the time_

 _She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie_

 _She is gone but she used to be mine…_

* * *

So, what do you think? Should I continue? Comments and even threats are very much appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note:** More songs from Sara Bareilles in this chapter (I really hope that doesn't bother any of you...): Once upon another time and Gravity.

* * *

 **We all fall in love sometimes**

 **Chapter three: Free**

 _Once upon another time_

 _Somebody's hands who felt like mine_

 _Turned the key and took a drive_

 _Was free…_

It's been a really long time since the last time she drove a car and doing it felt really weird to her now. Almost as if she had forgot how to do it. Almost as if she didn't want to remember and just allow the vehicle to take its own course… maybe right to one of those trees on the road… Maybe the impact of this car with a tree and her inside of it could end her suffering…

She was running away from hell, but would she ever get back to heaven? Did she deserve it?

 _…_ _I don't …._

 _I let him kill my spirit, end with everything there was about me and inside of me… I am a whore to the world and that would never change, nor even if I drive to the end of the world…_

 _…_ _The only way to end this is by not being here anymore…_

She was ready to do it. At least that's what she thought. Dana stepped a bit harder on the accelerator, ready to take the car to the nearest tree and end her pathetic excuse of a life, when…

"Dana! Wake up! Customers are waiting!" Peter yelled.

She was brought back to life and startled a little when she saw her brother getting up from his table ready to defend her from her boss.

"Bill! Don't, please. He's right. Go back to your seat," she asked and grabbed her notepad to serve to new customers. "I'll be with you in a moment. It's almost my break time," Dana said to Bill when she passed by him. He simply nodded.

* * *

Two more tables and ten more minutes later, she was ready to take a break. Since her brother had found her outside of the diner, they haven't had the chance to really talk because she needed to work. She thought it would be ok to have the extra time, before the conversation with her brother, to think what she would say to him. But reality was that she didn't know how to explain the hell she's been through.

Suddenly, a pair or arms wrapped her from behind when she walked by the front door, and she couldn't help a smile, one that faded away as soon as she realized that her brother was the main witness to Mulder's display of affection.

"How's my favorite woman in the world?" he asked, still with his arms around her.

"Very embarrassed, actually," she answered, trying to get away from his embrace.

"Why? Peter already knows this is my way of saying hello to you…"

"Yes, but my big brother doesn't, and he's right there looking at us," she said, pointing with her head towards Bill's table.

Mulder immediately let go of her, as if suddenly she was covered in hot acid. "What? Dana? Your brother? How did he find you?" he asked with excitement.

"I really don't know. I was about to enter the diner after you dropped me off and he was right there in the corner. He's waiting to talk to me and I'm already in my break."

"Oh, of course. I understand. Go with him", he said and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "I'm happy for you. This is very good news", he reassured her, in case she was thinking otherwise.

After exposing her strange and unusual relationship with Mulder to her brother, Scully walked to him. She wasn't ready, but it was time. At least for the 15 minutes that her break lasts.

She sat in front of Bill Scully and refill his coffee mug with a smile. In spite of everything, she was actually happy to have him in front of her again. "Who is he?" he asked with that protective tone of voice of him. One that he actually never used when she introduced Jack to the family. She always thought that was weird, at the moment, but never paid too much attention.

"He's a friend…" she sighed and decided that for the next 15 minutes she was going to be completely honest to her brother. It was the only way to get back to her old self. "… Actually, he's my guardian angel… my hero … He has saved me more than one time from Jack's attempt to take me back. He's been trying to… hunt me… but Mulder hadn't let him…" she said with a wide smile on her lips.

"How could you be thinking about falling in love again after everything that happened to you?"

"What?! So, what you're saying is that I can't get my life back together?! I'm not romantically involved with Mulder. Not yet anyway. But I will be, I want to be, because he has helped me heal and get my life back together… I want him in my life… as I want you guys…" she said trying to cool things down with her brother, reaching for his hand.

"If that were true, you would have come back", he said in a lower tone of voice.

"No Bill. I couldn't come back. I'm still hiding from a criminal, remember? He hasn't been aprehenden yet so I don't know how safe I am. You have to understand that… Besides, there wouldn't be any problem if I decided to start over my life here in California…"

"As a waitress?" he asked.

Maybe he sounded like a bit of a snob, but it was just because this was unbelievable to him. There, in front of him, was his bright and excessively smart little sister, dressed in a waitress uniform, wasting her life when she could be back to medical school, back to that bright future of hers…

"For the moment, yes, considering I can't be the med student with videos that have over 5 milllions of views on porn and sex trafficking web sites, right?..."

"That is not your fault, Katie! You are not the criminal!"

Bill raised his voice and a couple of heads turned to them, including Mulder's, who had been trying to listen something about the conversation, without any luck until right now.

He couldn't help it. His savior mode when on and after he could do anything about it, he was behind Scully. "Excuse me, Dana. Peter is calling you," he said, lying.

She looked up at him, knowing exactly what he was doing and smiled at him. "Thank you Mulder. Please, meet my brother, Bill Scully. Like me, a few months ago, he's under the impression that what happened to me, thanks to my ex-husband, is _my_ fault," she said looking at her brother with a sarcastic smile.

"I said the exact opposite thing, Katie," Bill said.

"You don't have to say anything at all, because I'm well aware who is the criminal and even though I was the one in front of the camera, it wasn't me," she declared and stood up from the chair. "You can stay here if you want. We're about to serve lunch… Unless you can't stay because this place and the life I'm trying to rebuild are beneath you." She turned around as soon as she finished her words, Mulder marching right by her side.

"I'm sorry," he said, with a hand on the small of her back. She took a deep breath, trying to hold back the tears. "For what is worth, I don't really think he sees you as a criminal or as someone that wanted what happen to her… He's just confused and maybe doesn't know how to deal with this whole situation…" he added and she looked up at him.

Her tears had become ice. "I don't know how to deal with this whole situation either, Mulder. But even though I'm not blaming my brother for… I don't know, doing absolutely nothing to save me from the nightmare I lived… You have done more than them, and you met me a few months ago…"

"That's not fair to them, Scully," he said, still caressing her back.

She took a deep breath, again, and closed her eyes for a moment. She just wanted to spend a quiet morning, working a slow shift, waiting to be over to spend the rest of the day with Mulder…. But this was anything but quiet…

"I know it's not… I have to get back to work. Sit, I'll bring you your usual lunch," she said with a smile.

"Thank you, honey," he said with a kiss on her cheek-one that didn't go unnoticed by Bill Scully at the end of the diner.

* * *

"Katie", he said again and she looked up from the counter she was cleaning at the moment.

Mulder was in front of her, and for a moment was confused with the use of that name, until he remembered the story she had told him that morning.

"Can we talk after your shift is over? That is, unless you have a prior commitment with your… boyfriend…" Bill said, looking at Mulder.

He tried not to, but ended looking at Scully's brother too, trying not to show the dislike he already felt about the man. "I'm not her boyfriend, Mr. Scully. I'm sure your sister already told you that. I'm a friend. Fox Mulder," His mother would be so proud of his politeness in front of this man who doesn't deserve any of it.

"Nice to meet you," Bill said, trying to avoid Mulder's eye, looking at his sister again. "So? What do you say Katie? I need to take you home." He tried to tone his voice down, but didn't help much.

Again, Scully took a deep breath and realized she had to deal with her brother in that moment. "This is my home right now, Bill. You have to respect that." She put an empty coffee mug in front of him, and started to fill it with the hot liquid. "Why don't you sit down right there and listen to the story about how I ended up here in Pasadena and not dead insided a car crashed to a tree?" she said in the calmest tone of voice possible, considering her words.

Even Mulder was startled after what she said and looked up to her with fear.

 _…_ _Once upon another time_

 _Deciding nothing good in dying_

 _So I would just keep on driving_

 _Because I was free…_

"… I felt free as soon as I saw that girl that was hitchhiking me… I was so ready to crash my car to that big tree that I almost didn't see her… But she tried harder and I finally saw her… She doesn't know this, but she saved me… I simply slowed down and got closer to her… She opened the door and greeted me with a wide smile… Emily was her name… She needed to come to Pasadena… I dind't know where I was going because, actually, I had got in that rental car to die… That was my original plan, but when I saw that happy girl, so carefree but so lost, I decided to be like her… I gave myself a second chance and she led me here… to you… She asked me to stop here in this very diner… where I later met you…"

"I saw you getting out of the car that night…" Mulder said, interrupting Scully.

"I know. I saw you too. But I never thought I would see you again… Until I started to work here two days later and you walked in completely drunk…" she said trying to hide a smirk and tone down the romantic vibe in front of her brother.

But Bill didn't need any help with that. He saw the lovingly exchange of looks between them and had to ruined the moment. "He definitely seems sweeter, Katie. But how can you be sure about anything? Jack seemed sweet too, and look what happened..." he said.

"I'm well aware of what happened, Bill. But I can't stay trapped underground like Jack had me. If I wanted to, I would've crashed my car to the tree like I first planned, don't you think?" she asked harshly and he couldn't keep her stare. "The only thing you need to know, big brother, is that I feel safe here. I'm been taken care of," she said looking at Mulder with a smile.

"What? Is he a bodyguard or something?"

Smile that faded away as soon as she heard her brother's sarcastic comment. "Yeah, I am... used to be, actually. I'm an artists manager right now".

"That's great", Bill answered with the same sarcastic tone.

"Bill, all you have to know is that I'm alive, well and trying my best to be happy. I filed charges against Jack, the Police closed and eliminated the sites with the videos of me in them, even though you can't completely eliminate anything from the Internet. I know he's here in Pasadena, but I don't want to go back to Washington, I can't just yet..." She took a deep breath, holding back tears. "So, you can say to mom where I am and I'll be happy to see her here in Pasadena, and Missy and Charlie if they want to. Right now, I can't go back to that place. Please, understand me." Her voice was about to break and Mulder grabbed her hand in comfort. Something Bill definitely saw. "Please, I barely got here alive. I wanted to end my life after I left DC. Washington is still hell for me... don't make me go back there yet, I don't want to feel the urge to die."

She couldn't hold back the tears anymore and neither could Bill. It didn't matter if Mulder was there. Both siblings were crying in front of him, trying so hard to reconnect after everything that happened. It looked like they were finally getting somewhere close to an understanding.

Bill took a deep breath and was the first one to talk. "I think I've ruined enough of your day, Katie. I'm gonna go. I pushed back a few meetings this morning when I ran into you, but I have to get back to work now..." he said and had a sip of his coffee. "Great coffee, by the way," he said raising the mug.

"Yes! She does it a lot better now", Mulder joked, trying to lighten the mood but only got a side eye from Scully.

Ignoring Mulder's comment, Scully asked: "How long will you be in town?" She was writing something in her notepad at the same time.

"Until Wednesday."

"Good. This is my address. I'm free in the morning tomorrow, if you have the time. Maybe we could call mom..." she said trying to smile without crying at the same time.

Bill nodded and took the note from her. "Of course. It's gonna be an amazing surprise for her."

Bill put the piece of paper in his pocket and stood up from the stool. Dana started to walk around the counter to say goodbye to her brother with a hug, while he surprised her with an unexpected similar action.

All of the sudden, he approached to Mulder and hugged him. Awkward at first, but then they both loosened up. "Thank you so very much for taking care of my sister. I don't want to admit it just yet in front of her, but I know you won't be like him."

And with that, Bill undid the hug and left Mulder with widening eyes and his heart about to explode from a combination of fear and excitement. What was this kind of sorcery? It didn't matter. He would take it anyway because behind Bill there was a happy and smiley Dana (his favorite kind), confirming in that very moment that the decision of being free staying alive, instead of looking for it in death, had been the best one so far. For here in front of her were her brother and her savior (who she feels but won't admit just yet as the love of her life), proving to her that happy days were yet to come, a kind of happiness that tasted like freedom, dreams, justice and much much love.

 _...set me free, leave me be_

 _I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity_...


	4. Chapter 4

**We all fall in love sometimes**

 **Chapter Four: Fear**

 _…_ _You're a butterfly_

 _And butterflies are free to fly_

 _Fly away, high away bye bye…_

This new life of his would be the end of him or, at least, the end of his liver. This was the third night in a row that he had spent drinking in a bar. He had everything invested in the business as an artist's manager.

So far, he only had four clients but he was just starting and at least, with this, his life would be a bit safer. His days as a bodyguard for big businessmen in Los Angeles were over. Yes, maybe now he always ended up drunk after closing deals in clubs and bars, even on "school nights" (like tonight), but he would get used to it. At least his artists had places to perform and he was close to sign two of them with local record companies.

Six months ago, he promised his sister to start a new life and he was doing exactly that. Some alcohol was included now, but he could always count with the 24 hours service in his favorite diner in town: Fran's.

Like almost every night, there were only three people in the diner at 2:20 a.m., him included. He used to pick one of the tables in the back of the diner, to not be disturbed by the freak that usually showed up at 2:30 a.m. shouting about the end of the world. But tonight, as soon as he entered the diner and saw her, he picked a stool in the counter. It was a weird thing to do, he was aware, but he couldn't help himself.

Coincidence? He didn't think so… He believed in destiny as much as the freak from 2:30 a.m. believed in aliens and the end of the world. He had dreamed of her, he was sure of it. She was the same redhead from four nights ago. When he saw her, parked outside of the diner, watching that other young girl getting out of the car, he thought she looked a bit like the woman from his dream… But tonight he confirmed it as soon as he walked inside the diner, and there she was in front of him, wearing the blue uniform and a smile, maybe too wide for a 2:00 a.m. costumer. He almost got sober at the sight of her and he couldn't help but to give her a smile back.

"Hi, I'm Dana Scully. I'll be your waitress this morning," she said to him, with that warm smile.

"You're new at this, right?" he said, trying to put a smile on his face too.

She frowned and put the coffee pot she was holding on the counter.

"Why do you say that?" Her smile was gone and he missed it.

"Because a waitress on a shift at this hour would never greet a costumer with such a wide smile and definitely wouldn't give her full name away… It's part of the mystery you gotta have if you're working at this hour."

He got her smile back and suddenly he felt happy. "Maybe, with my 'day time behavior' I'm sending a message to the universe: to let me have a much better shift in this diner, don't you think, mister…?"

"…Mulder. Fox Mulder. And you just made an excellent point. I'm going to miss your 'day time behavior' the next time I come at this hour and won't find you, because I'm sure the universe will get the memo." He grabbed a clean mug close to him. She got the message and filled it with coffee.

"And you only come here at this late hour?" She just remembered that he was the same guy she saw –drunk- two nights ago, when she dropped Emily in this very place where she had found an opportunity to start a new life: free.

"Usually, yes. But I got a feeling that is about to change…"

"Why?". She put the coffee pot down and took out from her pocket the notepad Peter gave her a few hours ago, when she started her first shift.

"Because the universe, who I'm sure you know as Peter, will grant you your wish of working when the sun is out."

She laughed, she couldn't help it. Who was this man? She had never talk to somebody so much in the past couple of years. She was actually scared of everybody and everything right now. She was there working, because she obviously needed the money, but she had barely spoken to anyone, so far.

"Are you always this flirty with the people that serve you coffee?" she asked trying to sound serious. She had just met this person. Why was she acting like that with him, considering her past?

"No. You are a gorgeous exception."

Actually, he couldn't believe his behavior. He wasn't like this. His lack of a romantic life was the proof of it. But it was as if he couldn't control his words, mesmerized by the beautiful redhead with the bluest eyes he had ever seen.

* * *

"Mulder, where are you?"

Scully asked him. He was sit on the stool again. Bill had left and she was behind the counter again, refilling the sugar containers, when she noticed that Mulder's stare was intensely on her, but going right through her.

Suddenly he was out of it and gave her a smile. "With you. Remembering the first time I spoke to you in this very spot."

She smiled too and put the containers down.

But, out of nowhere, his face expression changed and he squeezed her hand a bit harder. He didn't want to let go. Not now that he had new information. "I need to know this Emily person that saved your life, you know?"

She tried to let go of her hand after hearing his words. There was a reason why she hadn't share that part of her "journey" to him. She didn't want to seem even more fragile to him.

"I don't wanna talk about it, Mulder… I only told you guys that because I needed Bill to understand my situation. But I don't wanna talk about that moment with you… or anybody…"

"Scully…" he tried to interrupt.

"All you need to know is that I didn't do it and I haven't thought about it ever since… Emily led me to this place where at first I thought I wouldn't last a shift, but then I met you and the story changed. But, please, don't think about what I said earlier… and don't worry. I'm not gonna kill myself. Death is not the same as freedom to me anymore."

"I'm glad to hear that," he said, grabbing her hand again.

She let him and thought about that moment when they talked for the first time. Only two more people arrived to the diner that night, they only ordered coffee, so there wasn't much to do, and she spend the rest of her shift talking to him, actually, only listening to him. She wasn't in the mood to share her tragic story just yet. That would come later, when the ghost that her husband was to her, became real in front of her, right there in Pasadena.

"Hello… Now you're the one that went away. Where are you?" he asked.

She sighed and started to wipe the sugar she had spilled in the counter.

"Remembering, just like you. Only, my thoughts took me to darker times. That time you gave me a ride and I panicked when I saw him hiding in the bushes… Remember?" she said and had to stopped what she was doing. Her hands were too shaky. She suddenly felt completely frightened and he felt it too.

"I will never forget that night or your face in that moment, Dana. But you need to. Because you will never feel that way anymore. Not as long as I'm in your life, ok?" he asked trying to find her eyes with his.

"I know. But something that Bill said actually got me thinking… What am I doing here, Mulder? He's here too, so I should leave, right?" she said as one lonely tear streamed down her face.

He came closer to erase the tear with one of his fingers. "You can't spend your life running from him. You are not the criminal. You were a victim, and now… now you're just Dana, again…"

She smiled at him. Thanking him with her eyes his attempt to make her feel better and safer. Who would have thought that drunk man who one night stepped in the diner, trying to sober up, would be everything for her just a few months in the future?

"… but if you do want to go somewhere else, for a few days or forever, please, don't leave me behind," he finished.

She gave him another warm smile. Took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. She honestly was really tired of not knowing what to do with her life. But what could she do about it on a Sunday? Her shift was almost over and, for the moment, she would focus on that. Scully grabbed Mulder's hand and saying "no" with her head she told him: "I know I will have to think about it at some point, but I don't think today's the day to do it… Not after what happened today with Bill."

He nodded and smiled at her. Who would have thought that frightened woman he saw inside of a car a few months ago would be everything to him now? Only the thought of her leaving Pasadena saddened him completely, but he wouldn't lay that on her. It wasn't her fault she was, literally, the woman of his dream, that recurrent dream he had for so many weeks after his sister died of cancer.

"My shift is over. I'll be out in a moment," Scully said. Her words brought him back to earth and he quickly answered them with a charming smile.

* * *

They went back to her place, so she could change her uniform into more comfortable clothes and were now in a park, near her apartment. It was full of children, parents and some noisy teenagers. It was full of life, like it should be on a Sunday afternoon.

"Hey…", he said to catch her attention. She turned to him. "How are your… how's your chest?" he asked with a bit of embarrassment in his tone of voice.

She smiled and looked down to her cleavage. "Weird question…" she said trying not to laugh in his face.

"Well… not so long ago you were complaining a lot about it, so… It's only obvious that I wanted to ask you…"

"Yeah, yeah, don't worry. I don't mind the attention you've been giving to my cleavage…"

"… I wasn't…" he rushed to say.

"I'm messing with you, Mulder. Trying to be funny over here…", she answered with a smile. "… And it's better now. Still a bit swollen, but it's not painful anymore. I'll call you next month when I need another six-pack of beers to press against my breasts to cool them down, ok?"

"I'll be happy to make that delivery." Now he was the one messing with her.

In that moment, her facial expression changed completely and it took him by surprise. He tried to follow her line of sight and found a man, in his late fifties, staring at her with lustful eyes. He was used to that kind of stare. It was the one he saw in so many men, including some of his previous bosses, when he provided his previous bodyguard services in strip bars.

"Do you want to leave? We could go to the movies…" he said, caressing her hand, trying to calm her down. He understood what was going on with the man sitting in another bench across from they were.

"No… Maybe later. I'm not leaving the park just because a 'fan' recognized me…" she said, staring back at the man. Probably trying to burn him with her eyes.

"Dana…" Mulder was trying to call her attention, but her eyes were full of anger.

"No. I'm not leaving… Look at him… He's already reaching for his zipper. What? He's gonna masturbate here in front of all of these families or what? He's the creep, but I'm the one that has to leave because he probably recognized me from one of the videos? That's not fair." Now her eyes were on Mulder.

"It's not", it was all he could say at the moment.

"He can go to wherever the hell he came from and watch one of the many videos of me he probably has downloaded…".

Little by little, her anger was turning into sadness and her eyes were filling with tears that Mulder didn't want to see running down her face.

"Katie," he called her. Speaking a bit louder to take her away from that awful moment. "Look at me."

The use of the nickname that was reserved for her family members took her by surprise and she did as he told her to. Giving him back her blue eyes to his hazel ones.

"I'm sorry," she said, trying to recover. She took a deep breath and let go of her hair. "This is probably why he recognized me," she said putting the scrunchie in her purse. "I used to wear my hair up like this when he was filming me… In fact, I don't know why I wore like this just now…"

While he listened to her, Mulder took in his hand a few strands of her hair, feeling the soft texture of it. She wasn't bothered by this action of his. Nothing that he could do or say would ever bother her. She was certain of that.

"Sometimes I think I'm getting my life back and I go back to old routines I had before I went through that hell, but then, reality checks on me and don't let me go. Like this silly thing…" she said taking out the scrunchie back from her purse. "…Maybe I should cut my hair or change the color…" she added, trying to smile.

"You could also talk to somebody, don't you think?" he dared to say.

"I'm talking to you," she answered.

"That's not what I mean, Scully. You experienced a traumatic situation and… I think you need a therapist." There, he said it. He thought about it he minute she confessed her situation to him, months ago, but didn't want to upset her with the advice.

"I don't have money to pay for therapy, Mulder. And I'm not going to let you pay for it, because I know that's the next thing you're going to say." She was right about that. "I know I need to speak to somebody about what happened to me, but you help me with that, right?" she said taking his hand in hers.

"Of course, but I'm not a professional in the matter…"

"I don't need one… I just need you… and to know that the Police has catch him," she added with sad eyes.

* * *

 _Please, let me know what you think about this so far. Thank you._


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note:** Thank you so much to my friend harperrose87 for taking the time to review this chapter and for her kind words that always keep me going

 **We all fall in love sometimes**

 **Chapter Five:** I don't know what love is

… _ **I swear I've seen an angel**_

 _ **A paradise in blue**_

 _ **Every color I choose**_

 _ **But I don't know what love is,**_

 _ **But I think it might be you…**_

 _Dear Dana…_

 _It's been a few days since the last time I wrote to you… I've been trying to live a little bit more in the real world, rather than in here, trapped in these pages… But I can't leave you just yet._

 _The memory of what I used to be before Jack is still too vivid in me, and all though I'm not trying to be you again, sometimes I miss who I was too much… Better yet, I think I just miss the normalcy that used to surround me._

 _My new normal is still too weird for me. Who would have thought that being a waitress with an abusive ex husband and an overly loving new guy interested in me would be so eventful?_

 _I came to realize that up until recently, I've never been loved before –in a romantic way, I mean. What Jack felt for me was everything but love, what Daniel felt was just lust and the desire to fill his ego with the fact that he had fucked one of his students. Marcus, he was just a kid pretending to be in love with me…_

 _And I, I think I've never loved any of them either. I married Jack because he asked me to and I didn't want to say no to him, I didn't want to lose the comfort I used to think he gave me._

 _I simply didn't know what love was … Not until I let this new boy to be the owner of my heart… God, that sounds so corny, I'm well aware of that. But I can't help it. I love him. One day I'll tell him, soon. He wants to say it all the time, but I don't let him. Not yet. Soon._

 _Today is Friday. It's 7:49 p.m. and I'm supposed to be working until 11:00 p.m., but instead here I am, sitting on a stool in front of the counter writing to you while I wait for the man who wants to change our life for better. Two nights ago, I heard him begging my boss to let me finish my shift on Friday earlier so he could take me on a date. God! He actually said it like that, with the word date and everything. I'll tell you Dana, if I'm becoming corny with this "relationship", he's already there._

 _On that same night, he asked me out. I was wiping a table when he suddenly appeared behind me and kissed me on the cheek._

" _Do you want me to wait for you to be over so I can take you home?" he asked._

" _No, don't worry. I'm expecting Bill. He's leaving tomorrow morning so we're gonna have dinner," I said._

 _I know he's happy that I have my brother back in my life and that I could talk to my mom and sister early on this week. It wasn't an easy conversation. I'm not even sure if Missy is gonna speak to me again, but at least I heard their voices again and they could listen to mine. But when I told him that we couldn't spend the night together, he looked extremely sad._

 _He's getting so used to be with me, to the routine we're developing, and I'm not sure if that's a good idea. I know I said to my family that I'm not coming back to Washington, but I have to … sometime … right? I told Bill that I'm not thinking about medical school right now, but the truth is I miss it, too much. I can't let Jack win. He controlled almost two years of my life and I won't allow him to control another second of what I do._

 _But that's when Mulder becomes a problem. He's the first person I've ever loved (it's silly to keep denying that), so what would happen when I get tired of being "Dana, the waitress"? Do I force him to give up his life here in Pasadena to go with me to Washington?_

… _I guess that's a question for another time. He just entered the diner looking extremely handsome and I can't help the smile that's taking over my face. He's the reason for it, he's the reason I'm still alive and free. If it weren't for him, Jack would have caught me again months ago. He deserves my love and I deserve his._

 _Let him make you happy, Dana. He's already making me feel that way._

 _I'll write to you soon._

 _Love,_

 _Scully._

* * *

"Doing homework?," Mulder asked, noticing the notebook under Scully's hands.

She smiled at him while closing the notebook. "Yes, writing a new chapter for my memoir," she joked as she stood up from the stool to say hello to him with a kiss on his lips. Yes, a lot has happened on that week and he couldn't be happier about it. Neither could she, to be honest with the universe.

"Hmm, you can bet I'm gonna be the first one in line to buy that book," he joked back, leading her to the door, his left hand "installed" on the small of her back.

"Mulder, where are we going? I don't know if I'm well dressed for the occasion," she said looking down at her olive green dress with a V neck line, black tights and ankle boots, under a black knee length coat.

He showed the widest smile at her, enhanzed with his loving hazel eyes, and said: "You're perfect," follow by a sweet kiss to her cheek. She tooked his hand and pulled him down a little so she could grab him by the collar, then kissed him, passionately and without a hint of fear of anything. Not so long ago, she was thinking about the time when she would have to leave Pasadena to her life back in Washington, probably without Mulder. But for the time being she was there, across from her original life, in California, starting off something with him, being "Dana, the waitress," "Dana, the girlfriend of Mulder, the music manager," and that was okay, that was enough, that was keeping her demon out her head and her heart.

Scully ended the Kiss; they both sucked in a bit of air. When Mulder opened his eyes, he was greeted with the same pair of blue eyes he had learn to love, but they had a different shade all of the sudden. The shade of happiness, he knew because he recognized it from his own eyes everytime he looks at the mirror. She had done it, her heart was finally free to love after the nightmare she had gone through, and he was the lucky one to be on the other end of her feelings.

"I wasn't expecting that. I liked the surprise," he said, caressing her cheek.

She smiled at him and gave away a quick kiss to his lips. "Maybe it's time to let the old ways die," she said and winked at him.

* * *

Since Scully got to California, she had only been to Pasadena (and actually didn't know so much about it), so she was beyond surprised when she realized Mulder was driving her to Los Angeles for the night.

The song from Pretty Woman started to sound on her head as soon as she noticed they were driving down Hollywood Boulevard and she allowed herself to be happy with the little things. The amazing little things Mulder did for her.

"Hollywood? Mulder? I think I don't deserve this much," she said. Her eyes still on the streets, the bright lights, the people and the life going on outside the car.

"One: you deserve this and everything, Scully, I don't know why you keep questioning that. And two: I don't know how happy you're going to be when you actually know why we're here," he said, his eyes betraying him, showing fear to her.

"What are you talking about? Unless you're driving me around Hollywood Boulevard because I'm gonna have to play the hooker act again, you don't have to worry about my reaction to whatever reason we're here. I'm with you and I'm happy," Scully said with certainty, taking his free hand in hers. "But anyway, now you have to tell me why are we actually here," she added. "Although, now that I think about it …"

"Yep, you're too smart for me. You're going to figure it out," Mulder said, letting go of her hand and putting it back to the steering wheel.

"Hmmm … Why are you free on a Friday night, Mulder?" The bright lights on the streets didn't distract her anymore and she turned to look at him with her eyebrow up in the sky. "Shouldn't you be promoting Monica and her new song?"

"When was the last time you went to a concert, Scully?" he asked without looking at her.

She sighed and he feared for the worst.

"I don't think you want to know about that last time, Mulder…"

"Oh no… God… Scully… I'm…" He didn't know what to say. He knew what Scully was about to tell him was related to Jack. That man, again and again …

"He pointed a gun at me one night and forced me to put on a black short wig, a short, tight pink strapless dress, black stilettos, and red lipstick. Then he made me let some man penetrate me in a forgotten office of the night club where some rock band was playing that night. He, of course, filmed the whole thing. Three other men are on that video too, doing pretty much the same thing as the first one. I never actually saw the band during the concert, I wasn't there for that…"

"I'm sorry, Scully. I didn't tell you the plan for tonight because…"

"You wanted it to be a surprised. I'm not mad at you, Mulder…" She took his hand again.

He parked the car as they've arrived their destination. The sidewalk was fill with people in line, waiting to get in the club. Monica's face was on a poster next to the door. Among the crowd, Mulder saw Leyla. Anxiety all over her face. This was his worst idea ever: he drove Scully to a place that would triggered in her some of her worst memories and he would have to leave her alone for some time, on top of all because, by the looks in Leyla's face, Monica wasn't "behaving" and he would have to deal with her.

"I'm so very sorry I brought you here, Dana. I could even be endangering you … What if he's here…"

She interrupted him with a hand on his leg.

"He's not here. I'm sorry I brought that story up. This is your night and I want to be here with and for you. It is my duty as the woman of your life, isn't it?" she said with a smile and he smiled back at her too, happy to be listening to her saying those words.

"I'm glad that you believed it. You really are the woman of my life, don't ever forget it." Mulder caressed her face and got closer to lay a sweet kiss on her lips.

He hadn't told her about his dreams, but he kept having them. Dreams where she's her partner for life, living amazing adventures next to him, dreams that he's been having even before he knew her. That night outside the diner, wasn't the first time he had seen her face. He would tell her someday, right now he just wanted his dreams to come true and make her happy.

 _ **...If I had the courage**_

 _ **I'd know just what to do**_

 _ **Sometimes I have to crawl**_

 _ **And everyday I fall**_

 _ **Tryin' just to stand by you…**_

 _Oh God, Dana…_

 _Bill wants me to go back. He's back in Pasadena and he won't leave until I leave with him._

 _He was in San Diego when Charlie called him to tell him mom got sick and was at the hospital. He couldn't go back right away because of his work._

 _Mom's better now, out of the hospital. Melissa and Tara are taking care of her, but Bill got a bit of a detour from his way back to Washington and one morning he was back in the diner saying he wouldn't leave town unless I would leave with him._

" _When do you want to see mom again, Katie? When she's underground?"_

 _I know, he was being dramatic, but that's just Bill. He was right, though. I needed to make a decision about going back to Washington._

" _You don't have to stay, you know?" he said, and that's when I finally was able to look at his eyes. "Just come to visit her and the rest of the family. You could even take some of your stuff. And, after a few days or weeks, if you think you need to, you can come back here. Think about it"._

 _The truth is I've been thinking about it since the first time I saw him after almost two years._

" _Tell me the truth, Katie. Why are you so afraid of leaving? I don't think is about Jack anymore and the memories you have from Washington."_

 _I had to hide my eyes again when he said that. He was right. It's not about Jack anymore, not entirely._

A knock on the door distracted Scully from her writing. She put the pen down and closed the notebook. She walked to the door, praying to God that it wasn't her older brother. And it wasn't. It was Mulder behind the door. She welcomed him with a smile, trying to hide the concern on her face. "What is it? You don't look so well," he said. Apparently she failed in her attempt of lying to him. "Were you writing again?" he asked, looking down at her notebook.

"Yes … Well, just some thoughts. Nothing serious," she answered, taking the notebook from the coffee table and walking to her bedroom to put it inside the drawer of her nightstand.

"I think it would be better if you could have a laptop. It will be easier for you to write…"

"I can't afford a laptop right now, Mulder."

"I can," he volunteered and she just sighed.

She needed to address the matter. Bill would called or showed up anytime soon and she had to have an answer for him. She sighed again as she sat down on the bed, her eyes down on the floor, avoiding Mulder.

"Scully, what is it? You're scaring me," he said, sitting down next to her.

"You know how I told you Bill is back in town, right?" she asked; he nodded. She took his hands in hers. "Well, he told me he wouldn't leave until I leave with him. He wants to take me back to Washington." She finished her words with a broken heart and tears that were landing on both of their hands, still intertwined.

"But you would be back here afterwards, right?" Mulder asked, one of his hands on her chin trying to lift her head up and meet her eyes.

"I don't know." She stood up from the bed and knew it was time to be honest with him. She walked to her window without facing Mulder.

He was still sitting on the bed. Her "I don't know" had almost shattered his heart.

"Can I be honest with you, Mulder?" she asked, still with her back to him.

"I'm just realizing now that you haven't been this entire time."

He was mad, she could sense it. "That's not true." She turned around to keep talking, this time to his face.

But Mulder was already there in front of her, by the window. "You say you want to be honest with me, so answer me this with all honesty…" She sighed and closed her eyes, dreading the worst. "Do you love me?" he asked and she opened her eyes, two sky blue gems looking right at him.

"Oh Mulder, I never knew what love was until I met you. I do love you, so much. I don't know how you did it, because I was dead inside, but you –with your love for me- brought me back to life and taught me how to love," she answered honestly.

He smiled and kissed her. Their foreheads met after. "Then this doesn't have to be difficult. Go back to Washington. Go hug your mother and the rest of your family, be the Dana Scully you used to be. If you really want to. And I'll be here, loving you."

"I don't deserve you," she said, hugging him tight.

Her tears and sobs were now free while he caressed her back, still together in an embrace, trying to calm her down. "Yes, you do. I've dreaming of you and your beautiful face even before I met you Scully, so I'm not going to grow out of love for you because you won't be here anymore. I'm certain that I am for you and you're for me. Maybe it won't be right now, but we will be together. I have the courage to let you go."

His certainty was calming her down and she broke their embrace a little, just to be able to look at his eyes. "I'll always remember us this way," she said and welcomed his last kiss for her.

Later that night, Bill showed up by her apartament. She had her suitcase ready and Mulder had already left. They wanted to say their goodbyes without an audience.

Scully took a last look to the place where she had put back together her pieces, shed one last tear, turned off the lights and closed the door behind her.

* * *

It was that time of the month again and her boobs were swollen like that time when Mulder showed up to her apartament with a six pack in hand and had found her passed out from pain and almost naked.

She opened up to him on that night and allowed him to get a special place in her heart. He was already in love by then, she was… scared of her feelings.

It's been 8 weeks since the last time she saw him. They talk on the phone almost everyday but lately the calls take longer to make their way to her, because he's on the road all over the west coast with Monica.

 _I miss you so much tonight, Mulder…_

The phone rang just after her thought of him. It's not the first time that happened. She often thinks oh him when she needs him the most and he would call her right in that second.

It had to be him on the other end of the phone. She needed to listen to his voice.

"Mulder?" she said.

"Scully," he answered.

Both their faces were lit with happiness and love.

"The Pasadena Police Department just called me, Dana."

The pain in her body was forgotten as soon as she heard his words and she stood up from her childhood bed, where she had been sleeping for the past 8 weeks.

"They caught him. Inside your apartment. He's trapped, you're safe".

… _ **I don't know the tempo**_

 _ **Of my heart's concertó**_

 _ **It all seems like a dream**_

 _ **It's not, I know**_

 _ **There's something real out there for me…**_


End file.
